I grew up like most of you out there subjected to three major kind of education. The first is family education, second is academic education and the third is called religious education.
Family education focused on duty. I learnt to be obedient to authority- my parents,elders, etc. I heard to do whatever they asked me to do whether I felt like or not under the assumption that they meant well for me.Failure to comply resulted to punnishnent. I learnt my first lesson- suppress your feeling and comply to avoid punnishnent.
The Religious education focused on submission. We are to submit to the instructions as written in the holy books. I must pray at a particular time and place whether I like it or not. If I fail to comply, I would be sentenced to eternal punnishnent. I learnt my second lesson. Suppress my feelings and submit to what the gods say or risk going to hell
The third education is societal education.We had to obey the written and unwritten laws of the land or risk getting jailed. No one cares if you enjoy paying taxes. I learnt my third lesson : suppress your feelings and conform to societal expectation.
All these education taught me to focus on ideas outside of myself. My parents, religion and society had little or no concern for my feeling . Pleasure and humor are to be swept underground.I am not to search for my own happiness even when my happiness does not interfere with that of others. I feel guilty for pursuing my dream. It means I am deviating from the dreams of the religious group,parents or society. It means I am a selfish fellow. I am a rebel for not living a duty oriented life.
Selfishness is synonymous with evil. A selfish person is one who is concerned with his own need. when did that becomes a terrible thing . we are encouraged to sacrifice our desire . Is self sacrifice really a virtue? Teaching of self sacrifice encourage one to value others more than oneself. It may lead to low self-esteem.Self sacrifice teaching has prevented many of us from achieving our dream.