The rise and fall of early booming coaches

Paul Clement began to help soccer players as a Physical education teacher at the age of twenty-three. He was so effective in the job that he was asked to coach Fulham youth team. Chelsea snapped him up to work in their academy and finally promoted him as an assistant manager under Carlos Ancelotti. The duo did well together that the Italian manager took him to be his assistant at Paris St Germain, Real Madrid and Bayern Munich. The duo won the UEFA champion league as well as other trophy.

Trouble began to kick in when derby and Swansea appointed him manager. Clement performed woefely that one began to doubt his coaching ability. What would make a wonderful assistant manager perform poorly as a manager?

Peters principle gives us a clue. A person is promoted due to their success in previous job until he is no longer competent in their new job as a result of lacking the skill needed . Many exceptional teachers perform very well as vice principal but when they are made the principal of the school, their performance drops. He begins to spend more time in the office appending signatures to files as well as attending to meetings upon meeting and less time in the classroom

The role of a youth coach differs from that of a club manager. The former is responsible for the Athlete whereas the later is responsible for the club managment. A youth coach is successful when he transforms a mediocre player into a super star. He instill the needed skill to the player to improve his performance. A team manager is successful when he wins matches and take home the trophy. To promote an assistant manager to a main manager comes with extra responsibility for which the individual may not possess The youth team coach enjoys bringing out the hidden potential of young athlete.The fact that he did well there was because he loves the work more than he loves to win. Not everyone loves competition . Not everyone is well suited to the fame and power that comes with taking the lead role. Some individuals are better off helping from the background.

Both positions come with different skills. Unless the coach has the new ability needed, he is destined for failure. This begs the question. If a youth coach is offered an opportunity to manage a club which he knows he lacks the ability to perform at that time, should he reject the offer?

The first factor is the individual perception and reaction to failure. Employee who perceive failure as a terrible thing hate being sacked.One who dreads to fail is better off in his comfort zone . Job security is Paramount to such individual. When a team fails, the fans blame the team chief manager . . The chief responsibility of facing the media falls on the head.The backroom staff are overlooked. Such person should first change his mindset on failure before he can accept such offer. Failing to step up counts as failure. Real failure comes from inability to learn from ones mistakes. He should see the offer as an opportunity to gain new experiences and meet more people in the sport sector. He should understand that all great coaches failed one time or another but learnt in the process. Every failed match is an opportunity to reflect on the likely reason and improve his knowledge.

The second factor depends on the individual ability to embrace the change that comes with learning . Slow learners are better off rejecting that offer as they are unable to deal with the immediate complexity that comes with the new role. Fast learners should take the job while asking for help from experienced persons outside the organization. For instance, he may choose a more experienced assistant manager. He should not hesitate to engage in additional training in that new skill which he lacks.

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Club owners are unreasonably optimistic. A club legend does not necessarily make a great coach . Diego Maradona is a typical example . A good sergent may make a bad captain or a worse general. One may be good at obeying order but terrible at knowing the best circumstance to give such order

Self Born

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Except one is born again…….

The message of born again has been misinterpreted in various ways. Today, to be born again simply means mumuring certain words of accepting Jesus into one life.

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A newly born child is oblivious of the status quo. He has no belief, no knowledge, nothing. As he grows,he is influenced by teachers,parents, clergy etc . He becomes a conformist to the society expectation. He looses his identity . He takes on the words,dress, religion, pleasure of his fellow .

To make heaven on Earth,the first step is to loosen our grip on all we think. Let go of your opinion, morality, deeply held belief. All these make up the false self. To be born again is to scrape off the false self , the society- taught way of thinking and open oneself to a new one. By dying to our old self, we let go of all previous teaching we have ever received. A born again person experience a change in perspective. It seems his values is turned upside down. He takes on a new personality and mindset. He leaves old friends. The world around him no longer make sence. Things you used to enjoy no longer serve you. You tend to spend more time alone.

Anyone who has never changed his core beliefs or religion is yet to die to his old self. Dying to old self is prerequisite to a new birth. A seed has to be buried to the ground before it can germinate. Many atheist and agnostic are dead to their old self. They are one step ahead than most of us who are yet to question our belief. The second step is observation. Not one created by someone else but one based on his own seeking and experience. A born again person does not take things because it is repeated by many or asserted by majority or written in a holy book. He listens to all side and filters them based on his reason and experience.

Born again persons are original in thoughts and deed. He is saperated from the mass . To be born again comes with a price of violating recognises order. This lead to grave consequences including death .

Diverging mission behind divorce

Just as a child graduates from high school into college, his priorities shift. The courses he takes become more narrow. He drops some classmates behind and retain few classmates who share the same college preference and same course. We do not go remain in high school out of loyalty to our friends.

As we age, our values, hobbies job etc changes. This is a sign of growth.one whose priority remain constant is stagnant like a child who fails to learn . Our choice of life partner also change.

A partner is one who embark on a similar journey with us. As our priority changes, that of our partner may remain the same or change in a different direction. One partner is taking a leap in one direction and the other partner is watching while giving her full support . There are other relationship where the other partner discourage you from keeping up to your new ideal.you no longer feel connected. You become incompatible . Just because you are in a union does not mean you must follow our partner as he/ she changes her priorities

We find ourself finding time together with some else on a similar path and less time with our partner . We become more open to new partner there all boundaries are broken. We begin to fall in ln love with the new person. Afterward comes a sence of guilt. We feel we are cheating on our partner. When we are with him,we are happy. Afterwards,we are ashamed of ourself. Our shame comes from having made a vow to love one person forever. Our guilt comes from the society conditioning that we should only love our partner and no be me else. we are left in a dilemma: to honor our feeling and continue with this our new friend or continue living in a lovelessness marriage and deny ourself the opportunity to grow .

We feel guilty for cheating on our partner. This cheating arises because we do not totally tell our partner what is happening with the other person A committed relationship involves honest and humble individual who understand that their partner could fall out of love with activities and people one used to be with . When such happens, one absorbs the partner of blame knowing fully well that change is part of nature . Feelings are not always predictable. We may feel hungry at odd time.we may be happy one minute and sad the next minute for no apparent reason. We should feel acknowledge our feeling and express them to our partner . To get attracted to someone else beside our partner is not a taboo. When the partner understand that we are matured enough to emphasize with them as they express their pleasant feelings and experience with a new colleague without feeling jealous or judgemental, She/he would be more willing to open up her heart to you. This communication can make us understand our partner more,lead to greater intimacy and makes the other person feel safe and secure.

Whenever one wants to be with the other person.we let them embark on the journey.We communicate our feeling openly and arrive at a mutual agreement of divorce than to live in denial with all it’s lies and betrayal. A monogamous relationship does not necessarily mean we own our partner.It is not a life sentence. It is a process for growth. Letting go can become a gain rather than a loss when it leads us to our higher self.we can still retain the friendship while taking time to grow . Sticking to a union that does not lead to a higher growth can be detrimental to our wellbeing

The best relationship is the relationship where each promise to tell the truth even when it hurts. Cheating arises when one begins to hide the truth because our partner may not be able to handle it. Not all relationship are meant to last forever. Some relationship are meant to propel us to a greater height. Some relationship brings out hidden potential in us we never new existed. Another relationship improves on that potential. No monogamous relationship is a failure. Each has one lesson to teach us. It takes wisdom to know when a relationship has served its purpose and move into a new one.

We should not just bail out of every relationship. We should be sure that the reason for unfulfimment in the union does not arises out of faults. Rather, we discover we no longer derive Joy in activitiess we used to . One partner has encountered a change in Religion and we cannot tolerate that .We feel lonely in the presence of our partner and alive in the presence of another without any reason . We should examine ourself to know whether we are in the union out of fear or out of love. Are we scared of what people we say when I leave? Am I scared of loosing certain previledges? We cannot truely grow in an environment of fear