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nigeria relationship Teaching wierd

Five Reasons Why Great Thinkers Struggle In their Marital Lives

History tells us that great thinkers whose thought changed the world never got married. Jesus of Nazareth whose philosophy gave birth to one of the most populous religions in the world abstained from marriage. Immanuel Kant never married. Isaac Newton remained single. John Stuart married very late . Few who married were involved in divorce cases. Did they take an oath of celibacy?

(1) Great thinkers are super introverted. They need time alone to think.He dislikes noise. Thinking involves great concentration on an issue His focus is on the subject on his head and not any lady. After spending time outside, he comes back home to reenergize in silence. Women on the other hand prefer to talk about her days activity. He would rather spend his time alone than listen to the endless tale of a woman. Rationalisation is the defense mechanism that helps him  cope with life stress. She will never be number one in his priorities.

(2)Each society operates within a certain code.Great thinkers question these codes. Great thinkers have their own view of relationship . His idea of a perfect marriage is wierd.e.g non-monogamous marriage. Cohabitation without marriage. This could be illegal in some society. Others perceive marriage as a prison one should be free from.  Many thinkers priotise friendship over marriage.They can see beyond the illusion of happily ever after. They dislike the drama that comes with two strangers with different upbringing living under the same roof. He can see the flaws in each  woman the same way he sees flaws in the world. Scholars perfectionist nature makes him seek the ideal woman to marry. Unfortunately, such woman does not exist. He will not settle for less.

(3)Great thinkers do not have a life like the ordinary person.They can be boring to an average lady. They live in their head. They care little for personal appearance. It is common to see him with unshaved beards or torn clothes.He spends time thinking that he forgets about food. His body looks worn out. He spends less time doing and more time thinking. The world pays for your skills not for your thoughts. He thinks out loud while talking.He is easily mistaken for a mad man.Some of them got dismissed for deviating from the norm. Bertrand Russell remained unemployed for supporting gay marriage in 1929..They are  jobless. He has no defined source of livelihood.Which lady will happily settle down with one?

(4)Great thinkers possess unique philosophy. His views are in minority. ..Most great thinkers are on a mission to spread her ideology. First he needs to find a mate who thinks  the same way as he does. Since his ideology is mostly his, the odds is less than one in a thousand. Most times, he had to choose from female  disciples. Secondly, she ought to find him attractive enough and thirdly she needs to share in his mission to move from one place to another to share his those . She should understand that she will always fall behind his love for intellectual pursuit. He will gladly divorce her if she becomes an obstacle.

Intellectuals seek like minded partner. Unfortunately, they are rare

(5)Neurologists tell us that the  human brain is divided into two parts. One part is emotional and the other part is rational. Philosophers have a highly developed rational mind and poorly developed emotional side. Most women have poorly developed rational side and well developed emotional side. Women are feelers.philosophers find it difficult to understand the feeling creature. He tells her she looks fat and she gets angry. But she asks for his opinion. Most women cannot handle the truth. Men are thinkers. To convince a thinker, she has to use argument. But her less developed intellects makes it difficult. A woman cannot manipulate a philosopher. He sees through her mind games.

We are different. We cannot be fixed into a box. It is unrealistic to expect each person to be suited for marriage. Great scholars are happier single. Marriage could hinder his mental activities.

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education feminism gender nigeria relationship religion sex Teaching wierd women

How Purity Culture teaches wrong sex education

Purity culture: any teaching that places the honour of a girl/woman on her vagina and reinforces the idea that premarital sex make women worthless.

Purity /noun/: the state or quality of being pure.

Pure /adjective/: clean and not containing any harmful substances; complete and total.

Purity culture is blaming Eve for giving the apple to Adam and enticing him to sin. Every Christian girl knows Eve is the architect of our misfortune. Every bad thing women experience today is a result of Eve’s sin. Purity culture is comparing girls who are sexually active to expired food products. Because you know, girls automatically become expired milk after they have sex.

It is placing the burden of the sexual urges of men on women. If a man lusts after you, then you probably looked or dressed a certain way to entice him. Purity culture is using “defile” to describe rape and saying Dinah was defiled, instead of saying Shechem raped her. Purity culture is telling girls that they are responsible for the sexual purity of men, because unlike men who are inherently sexual, we are just vessels who aren’t supposed to be sexual. Purity culture is telling girls that only “bad girls” enjoy sex.

Many churches practice and teach purity culture targeted mainly towards girls. Some go to the extreme, by holding daddy-daughter dances where girls pledge their virginity to their fathers, vowing to wait until they get married to have sex. Some wear rings on the fourth finger of their left hands, which they eventually take off and replace with wedding rings after they get married and have sex for the first time.

The culture that places women on a pedestal of innocence and purity enables the punishment of women that do not maintain this image. There are multiple way sin which purity culture and here are 5 important ones you should know.

Misplaced Sexual Responsibility

Purity culture has been branded as all of the ways women can stay protected and holy in today’s society. The truth of the matter lies in the fact that this only serves to subjugate women even more. By placing women on these pedestals, it places the onus on women to cover up and ensure that they are not temptations for men, forgetting that rapists are not dissuaded by the physical appearance. Purity culture is also set up in such a way that encourages women to avoid taking charge of their sex life. It paints women that deviate from this as whores who need to be shamed and punished, hence why when a women is raped and she is vocal about her sex life, it is brushed off because she asked for it by taking charge of her sex life. This is how purity culture normalizes and trivializes sexual assault .  

Most Religions do give women right to make decisions concerning her body

It does not define Consent

Women who have been raised religiously have been taught in some way by socializing influences, that they do not exist for themselves. They are to keep themselves holy and covered up, and to wait patiently in their fathers’ houses until a man approaches said fathers for marriage. It is in all the biblical stories and anecdotes describing model women of faith and religious principles.

This is problematic because not only would the woman lack individuality, there are no boundaries of consent. There would be nothing that says that she can say no to her husband. In Nigeria currently the law does not recognize marital rape as rape. So even when it feels like rape, when she knows that it is rape, when there is physical evidence of rape, she says nothing because she has been conditioned to think that the man has only taken what was his in the first place.  

Good girl/ Bad Girl Binary

Purity culture divides women into two groups ; the good girls and the bad girls and pray to God you don’t fall into the latter group. When a girl who is seen as a bad girl is abused sexually or physically, people see it as a punishment for her behaviour.

Guilt and shame are products of purity culture, when girls are taught that they become worthless after they have sex outside marriage they live with guilt and shame and it is even worse when they experience sexual violence because the victim automatically assumes it is just a punishment for the way she behaved or even dressed. What I don’t understand is how people expect women who finally have sex after they get married to just shake off this feeling of shame and guilt they’ve associated with sex because of what they were taught.

Her Body Her Choice

Nobody throws chastity balls for boys asking then to pledge their virginity to their mothers and the church, nobody makes women the gatekeepers of the sexuality of men so why then do people do it to girls? Double standard much?

Don’t get me wrong, abstinence is a good thing and it wonderful but not when it is forced on people. Instead of teaching and encouraging purity culture, instead of teaching girls to associate fear, shame and guilt with sex why not teach girls good and quality sex education. Teach them their body belongs to them alone and not to their fathers or the church. Talk to them about the clarity that comes with abstinence, tell them abstinence is a choice they can make without the pressure of the church. Teach them that they are not responsible for the sexual purity of men. Teach girls to love and embrace their bodies instead of seeing it as a weapon the devil uses to lure men to hell.

How Purity Culture Enables Rape Culture

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facts life wierd

Inner Guidance

What I feel is my Creation

What I see is my reflection

What impacts me is my attraction

Showing me something that needs my attention

Negativity are precious present

Bringing me to self awareness

Reminding me of my mission

To learn life numerous lesson

To trust the learning process

As I forgive my mistakes

Struggles are signs to let go

Of my need to control

Dig inside to find my true self

By shattering the veil of my false self

Empowered feeling signifies right track

Pleasant emotions are positive feedback

This mindset provide opportunity for growth

As I embark on a journey of self love

Categories
facts wierd

wierd but true

1
farting helps reduce blood pressure and is good for your health so stop being ashamed of your self for farting.

2)
When getting a new car, choose
one that is silver. The color is
most visible on the road and is
least likely to get into an accide

3)when you sleep in a cold room,you have higher chances of having a bad drea

4)spanish national anthem has no wor

5
flowers grow faster when music player plays near the

6)chewing gum makes a person fart more than usual.

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