Nigeria is a blessed country made up of different ethnic groups. These groups find it difficult to live peacefully among each other.There is an eye of suspicion that arises whenever come in contact with one who is different from us. We do not trust them.
The ability to get along with those with different mindset is essential to build a brand new country. It involves patience, understanding and acceptance of those of different ethnic group, language, religion and political views.
We ought to understand that when everyone thinks and behave in the same manner,the nation would be boring. Variety is the spice of life .diversity is central to humanity. A tolerant person recognises that his enemy has the right to think his own thought and live his own life as long as he doesn’t interfere in that of others. It gives to others the same freedom we crave.
A tolerant Muslim ignores hurtful remark from a thirteen years old. A tolerant Christian does not loose his cool when handling difficult situation. Both understand that even though everyone believe in the same religion, their understanding of that Religion would differ.A tolerant APC leader forgives the errors of PDP leaders and not constantly picking on them. A tolerant prison warder respects the right of prisoners. A tolerant spouse do not pick quarrel constantly with each other.
When we force the minority tribe into doing our bidding, hatred and contempt is not avoidable. By making certain allowance,we transform a harsh house into a sweet one
One way to increase our religious tolerance level is to study more about the other person Religion. Do this without the intention to convert to their religion but to understand why they believe in what they believe.l remember harbouring a slight contempt for Muslims who do not partake in eating a cow killed by a Muslim.I saw this as segregation.It was not until I inquired from a Muslim that I understand it had more to do with the love for cows that they do not want to watch it suffer while dying . They believe cows should die a quick death so they kill cows in a specialway using sharp knife while offering a special prayer. My contempt was based on ignorance. My newly acquired knowledge errased my false assumption
Visit other states.make friends with people from other tribes. try to learn another language.If there is going to be peace in this nation,it would require a new approach to striving for political and Religious power, an approach that is no longer based on competition,but one that sees all as one through competition and partnership. we will learn to handle our differences without aggression.open our heart to the possibility of ethno- religious unity.Find a common thread that runs through us all and forget about converting one another. to sharing.
You know this society is not working. you are managing to exist. eating from hand to mouth. struggling to make a living.
you find a partner in similar or worse situation like you and for love or other selfish reason, choose to get married and bring a child into this world.
A child that would be forced to struggle like you. To use him as cheap labor in your farm ? As a secondary source of income e.g bride price,child hawking As bragging right among your peers? So you can flex your authority and power on him/her
Why? so that when you get old you will guilt trip them into taking care of you with words like ” after ,bringing you into this world after all I have done for you.
you think because you brought him to this miserable world,he owes you his life. what did you do for him? you starved him, no tertiary education, no comfortable bed.
AF if it is compulsory for one to own a child. do we really care for the children? do we really want them to be a part of this cruel world? Many orphans are praying for caregivers in orphanage homes but we do not give a damn.we want one that come from our body so we have a sence of ownership
you are not happy. your partner is not happy. the society is not happy. yet we bring fotth a child to share in the unhappiness. are we not. cruel to children?
The end SARS protest has taken many by surprise. Before now, soccer used to be the only force that unite the world. Protest has broken that jinx as it has brought both both male and female together. The feeling of interconnectedness is visible for everyone to see .
Protest shows a side United for a change. Every Religion promotes unity. The Bible tells us that where two or more are gathered in God’s name,God is in their midst . Youth are United from different works of life to share their fears and concerned. They are gathered against injustice.
lamenting gives the victim a chance to heal. True forgiveness occur when one vents out his true feeling towards the other. This is a step towards reconcilation. protesters are laughing as they walk displaying funny messages on their placards.
The clamour shows strangers feeding each other the way Jesus fed the five thousand. The free medical services given to the injured is a practical illustration of Jesus parable of the good Samaritan. The act of offering ones bedspread to strangers lying outside to cover them from adverse weather conditions is a true act of kindness promoted in all religion.
Few years ago over a thousand Ministers from various religion tradition in India matched to denounce the social ills in the country . The protest included Christian, Jewish and Muslim clergies. Bishops took active part in the current black lives movement in America. what prevents our clergy from participating actively? .
When Shite top leader was detained by Federal Government, the regional leaders led the people to a violent protest. When Catholic priest was abducted in benue state, the bishops led the people to a peaceful protest. In these protests, the youth played an active role . Today, the youth are protesting against police brutality, the clergy are not physically active. The youth could interpret this as clergy protest only when one of them is personally hurt. Until SARS brutalised one of them , they will remain silent. The youth should not perceive clergy as selfish preachers who act only when they are hurt. This could mark the begining of lack of trust towards the duo. The revolution now now protest by Sowore received a poor turn out simple because he was a politician and the people do not trust politicians. Religion continues to thrive in the country because of the perceived trust the people have in the Men of God. This trust has been declining gradually in recent times especially since clergy began to mingle in politics . The politicians are currently alledged to be opposing the protest behind while singing their support publicly. They are accused of sponsoring hoodlums to stop the protest. They have been suspected to have a hand in calling threatening protesters to back off. Are the clergy receiving the same threat?
It is in trying moment one knows his true friends.The clerics need to take a stand. Are they in support of the top government officials and politicians whose financial assistance sustain the church ? Would they side with the youth who participate actively in God’s house. In the fight against oppression,the silent one sides with the oppressor .A one hour presence on the street is all the youth need youth people need . The presence of a spiritual leader can help steer the protest toward a more peaceful and Godly manner.
This year, the Federal Government joined other nations to impose a curfew as one of the steps to reduce the spread of covid 19. The people lamented on the effect such law had on individual freedom. Earlier this month,the nation marked her sixty years freedom from Western colony. Few days ago, the people protested against the Special Anti-robbery squad for (SARS) for invading on human rights.
While we focus on external freedom like geographic freedom, financial freedom,and political freedom we neglect a fundamental freedin- mental freedom. …. Mental freedom is freedom from society conditioning, society expectation and need for approval. It is the detachment of oneself from society labels. It is the recognition that one is not ones gender. One is not ones tribe.One are not ones religion .These are roles assigned to us while we are young. They were neccesary at that time when we lacked the ability to think. Now we have a choice to examine them and not carry them through adulthood.
Mental freedom begins by excersicing control over ones emotion. Ones emotion does not dictate what one does. Frequent outburst over little triggers signals one who is a slave to his anger. Theft and corrupt practices are signs of a slave to emotion of desire and greed. Whatever controls your emotion controls you.
Men who are unable to cry in public for fear of being labelled a weakling are in gender bondage.He cages those tears,act tough ,engage in drinking and smoking and other maladaptive act to suppress those emotion. A free person would choose to let the tears flow. Women who abandon their career to cater for kids out of duty as a woman and not out of love and personal choice is a slave to traditional gender roles.
One who is naturally kind and compassionate but will not hesitate to watch a thirteen years old boy die over opposing view is not free to his conscience. As long as we need an ancient book to tell us what is right and what is not,We cannot be mentally free. The book is thinking for us.
One who prefers candidate A but goes ahead to vote candidate B because his politicalGodfather, parent or religious leaders asked him to will continue to be a pawn in their hands. A governor who takes decision to please the Godfather but not in the state best interest is a slave to The godfather.
To be liberated from societal conditioning, we need need to examine the effect certain words have on us . He notices thoughts that brightens his mood and those that does not Why do I feel angry each time someone insults my Tribe, My prophet, my political party? These tribes, prophet, party existed long before I was born. I am not them. My happiness should not be tied to someone perception of them.
Next is to challenge our thoughts. Why do I belong to this group in the first place.? Could it be because my immediate family belonged here? If they belonged to the opposition, would I be a member of the opposition? Am I biased? Then he plays the devil advocate. He tries to see things from the opposition point of view. What if they are right?
We exlores our tendency to hand over decision making to Those perceived as superior to him Do I easily hand over decision to authority? Are authority always right? The present covid 19 pandemic showed a case of different medical doctors with conflicting view on the efficacy of Chloroquine in the treatment of the virus. Since experts could disagree over an issue, why can’t an individual disagree with the expert?
A mental free person explores various opinion ,engages in self- thinking and detach oneself from society labels. You are not your gender. You are not your tribe.you are not your religion .These are roles assigned to us while we are young. They were neccesary at that time when we lacked the ability to think. Now we have a choice to examine them . arriving at his own decision. His decision may not allign with that of the majority.He does then anyway.
Examining ones name, do I really love my name? You can begin by choosing a different name. One that reflects whom you really are or aspires to be. We can choose the values dear to us and live by them.
The journey towards mental freedom is not achieved over night. It takes periods of continuous effort . The society would never be in support of your quest.No jailer wants her captive to be free.
When Nollywood actor Pet Edochie fumed at the young men kneeling before a woman, he was backlashed. Pet was comparing happenings in his youthful age against the youth in this generation. The traditional Igbo man is highly placed in the society. During traditional wedding,the woman kneels down to propose to the man.The one who kneels begs the other for a favor.A typical Igbo man hardly kneels for his fellow man talkless of a woman . He only kneels for the gods who he recognizes as more powerful than he is.
Pet is not alone. Many men have noticed a decline in the masculinity of men. The Alpha male movement and redpill movement are attempt to correct this imbalance.When did thngs change? When did man begin to loose his ego to stoop so low to kneel before a less powerful being. Was the change sudden or gradual?
Women were seen as irrational and emotional.Men were the rational and strong willed. Men were taught to act like men They had to suppress their emotion close to their heart. Men should never cry in public. Expression of vulnerability is a sign of a weak man. Men are closed minded, rigid and structured. He should not seek fun .Men. Should always be in power, strive for control, compete.They lack empathy necessary for effective communication and connection.
In early days, male children joined their fathers in the river fishing or the forest haunting. Female spent their time with the mothers cooking. Each gender know his role. You hardly see a man in the kitchen or a girl hunting. Men learnt to act like men and women learnt to act like women.Then came the industrial era. Lands meant for farming and hunting was taking over by the government to build factory. The owners of the land were jobless.To offer compensation, the men were integrated as workers in this factory. Their male children were not allowed to follow dad to work.son stays at home with the mum while Dad went to work. Father leaves home as early as eight and comes home by six. He is exhausted, he sleeps to get strength for the next day. Fathers became absent in their son’s life. The role of dad in son life began to reduce while the role of mum in son life began to rise. Mummy passes over her feminine qualities to growing son.
Then came education. Female involvement in education at an early age especially science and law improve her reasoning abilities (masculinity) . Female take part in competitive games like the male counterpart. This improves their aggression.These women ended up as heads of organization.They took decision and gave instructions . These women began to have a thirst of power . Their masculine qualities were awoken.
Girls who enjoy highly competitive games with a desire to win also increases their aggression (masculinity). We tag such women names like Tomboy. They are ladies with highly developed masculine side and poorly developed feminine side.. Such masculine girls are attracted to the beta guys. If a man is more masculine in nature,he will be attracted to a very feminine woman who will compliment his energy. Balance men prefer neutral women.. Masculine girls at attracted to a feminine guy or sisi or beta guy . Such guys are few as society teaches guys to wear the Alpha mask. She can only find solace among her fellow feminine women. This is the origin of homosexuality- . Heterosexual are no different from homosexual as both seek balance .
Society has widened this energy balance over the years. Civilisation is bring closing the gap. Homosexual are closer to achieving balance compared to heterosexual. Yet, Homosexuals feel guilty for not complying with society expectation. . There is nothing wrong with homosexuality, for it IS what is. However, we need to bear in mind that society at this time is traumatized due to so many centurie conditioned to comply with that. DO we want to fit in? Until WHEN? We need to learn to Love who we are, while allowing others to be what they want to be. Acceptance is the way of Life.
We should understand that each individual hold masculine and feminine qualities within us. When both qualities are not well alligned, the person is out of balance. The traditional gender roles over the years has created highly masculine males on one hand and highly feminine female on the other side. we are drawn to certain individual that help us correct these imbalance. These highly masculine males become attracted to highly feminine female.
Son: what does the Bible teach about homosexuality and masturbation.
Dad: I do not know and I do not care to know
Son: But you are a Christian
Dad: yes, A Christian who follows the teaching of Jesus. Christ alone and not the Bible.
Son; But Bible contains Jesus teaching
Dad: true. It also contains the teaching of Paul,the teaching of Moses , the teaching of Elijah and many other teaching. As a Christian, I accept the teaching of Jesus Christ.
Son: Ok, Now what did Jesus teach about masturbation and homosexuality.
Dad: Jesus never mentioned any of them literally but he showed us with illaustration how to treat those whose views are different from ours.
Child: How?
Dad: He never condemned the adultrous woman, he visited tax collectors, he dined with sinners. He showered them with love.
Son : does that mean they won’t go to hell?
Dad: would you derive Joy in Watching your loved one in hell?
Son: No I won’t
Dad: good.
Dad: sex is a way of expressing Love. There are different stages of love. The first is love directed to oneself. A child grows up loving himself.Using sexual analogy, the child derives Joy playing with his body, his genital. Jesus said Love thyself.
Son : hmm
Dad: The second is Love of similar specie.The child begins to extend the love to those of closest to him+ family, friend,tribe etc. A boy plays with a boy.A girl plays with a girl. Using sexual analogy, this is homosexual. Christ preached Love your neighbor.
Son : I see
Dad: The third stage of love is where one loves those different from oneself .Jesus said Love your enemy.your enemy is your opponent, opposite,one with a different view. Sexually, one is attracted to the gender different from him.A boy is attracted to a girl and vice-versa.
Son :
Dad: One who hates masturbators and homosexuals and love heterosexual is no different from one who loves others over himself and his peers.Such person is in a third stage of love.
Son : which is the best.
Dad: All of the above.The fourth type. The pansexual. The attraction to all . Self, male, and female. It is universal love. Agape love. Love without condition.
Two ears ago, My uncle summoned his children on his sick bed and instructed the first son to take over his law firm. This was the same son who resented studying law and only studied the course to please the dad. The same dad has asked him to forfeit his personal ambition.
The young man was literally unhappy as he managed the firm. He obeyed bitterly. He poured out his aggression on the entire staff.
Obedience should be done out of love rather than duty. When an act is carried out of duty, the relationship with those around is diminished.
I had to tell him that he was not bound to his late father wish. He could simply employ a trusted fellow to manage the firm while he supervises periodically.
Children should be made to do things out of duty in the beginning.As they grow up, duty should be gradually replaced by love. Love is a better teacher than obligation. Duty is mechanical and externally motivated by a sence of obligation . Love makes it easier. Love transform responsibility to joy. A sence of duty warmed by a love for humanity creates the best result.
I have seen a girl reject suitor so they can take care their aging parents. While the act is commendable,It should be done out of love and not out of society expectation so she doesn’t regret it taking care of aged parent should be done from the bottom of her heart and not as a debt she owes you.
The factory worker who constantly looks at the clock for it to be five o click to drop his tools work out of duty and not out of love . Such a man will have lots of regret when he finally retires. Christianity is one religion built out of love rather than a sence of duty. God love the world that he gave his son……He did not owe the world. No one would punnish him for non compliance.To be a great teacher, begin by loving children. To be a great auto-mechanic, begin by loving automobile.
Whenever we meet a stranger, we try to evaluate the person in terms of our perception. We try to see what we share in common. The more similarly,the tendency to open ourselves more to friendship. We reserve a space for those who share our family, language, ethnicity and expand it to those who share our hobbies,job, religion etc. This common trait enable us build bridges beyond ourselves and those outside of us .
In the same way, when the dissimilarities are more, we create a barrier . We do not include them in our circle . We create imaginary wall. We hold our emotion so tight .
We are consciously or unconsciously connecting with people or saperating from them.The boss who isolates himself from the workers treating them as human machine is building a wall of saperation . The master who offers a word of appreciation,, ask how the children are doing builds bridges of connection. Every wall we build breeds a new wall .
Whatever keeps us from reaching out to people is a wall. It could be sence of superiority, wall of selfishness, intolerance, group,fear etc
To curb this, we should see ourselves first as human and admit that the other is a living being like us. Developing closeness to the entire human. Seeing ourselves in terms of this group or that group obstructs us from a wider identity as human beings. We should refrain from getting so attached to our religion or group as that would blind us from seeing the value of another religion. We can take a cue from doctors and red Cross members who offer assistance to injured without inquiring about the patient group. Our motive should be universal compassion and desire to alleviate the suffering of others.
Three Kinds of Work
There are but three general classes of work. They are:
WORK WITH PEOPLE; = managers
WORK WITH THINGS; technologist
WORK WITH IDEAS. = designers/engineers
Each individual is fitted by nature to do one of these better than the others and there will be one class for which he has the least ability. In the other one ofthe three he might make a mediocre success.
Engineering involves designing combined with material property, models to predict material behavior under certain condition and creative thinking
Engineering= drawing + mathematics +thinking,
Technology involves making things with tools , materials and skills to bring into reality the design of engineers
Technology Is a product
Engineering is a process
Engineering = applied science +mathematics
Technology =applied science + tools
Engineering specialization= design +calculation(use of head)
Technologist specialization= use of tools(use of hand)
From the above, we can see that mechanical engineers don’t build and repair stuff anymore as one does years ago. Instead, they draw plans and input it in a computer using basic computer aided design software such as solid works and auto cad. Such designs are sent to technologist for production. There is no automobile production plant in the country so automobile engineers are not utilized. The few designs end up in the journals wasted since no automobile plant to produce their design. We mainly import vehicles or their spare parts. Use of tools is the spec ialisation of a technologist. Hence, the average Nigerian expect an engineer to assemble or repair cars.
ILLUSTRATION There is need to design more fuel economy vehicle. An engineer applies scientific law.
Massflow rate= velocity * area
Velocity of automobile is determined by the driver, so he tries to alter the area of fuel delivery system to test if would have an effect on the quantity of fuel dissipated per unit time.. He applies differential calculus (calculation)to reduce the area of the fuel system. Next he draws his proposed shape on a paper(manually or using computer) and instruct the technologist to produce his new design. After it is produced, the system is testrun .
From the above, engineers are creative thinkers who find ways to solve problem
Technologist are part of the family who execute engineers thought
Without the engineer, there would be no change or invention
Without the technologist, an engineer idea would remain on paper
Both need each other.
In most big factories, engineers are not expected to handle tools. Technologists are not expected to design . companies hire engineers to do design work and hire skilled labour to do skilled work.
But some engineers know how to do repairs. Yes, such kmowledge was not learnt in classroom. It was either learnt during industrial training days or before got admission to study engineering. Similarly a technologist can learn how to design . learning both is an advantage to the individual as it ensures work security and more efficiency the same way a footballer can learn how to be a center back and a left back (e.g Chelsea victor Moses)
It should also be noted that the curriculum for engineers have changed. In the early days, engineers had little knowledge in management. Hence, the furtherest he could be promoted was a factore manager. An engineer would spend many years working while a fresh graduate who studied economice, accountancy and management are made general managers. Today, engineers are taught managerial courses like operational research,engineering economics, production planning etc. this is to enable him make managerial decision such as planning inventory, optimising production process, predicting depreciation rate to guide company when to purchase a new machine etc.-a shift from core engineering to management. This makes an engineer more versatile and a technologist less