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nigeria

The Ordeal of a woman

No matter how hard you try, as a woman, you will never get it right. Whatever you decide to do with your body or yourself, the society in one way or another will find a way of making you feel ashamed of it.

I could kiss Cynthia Nixon for her amazing poem.

Cynthia Nixon narrating ‘Be a lady they said’

‘Be a lady they said’

‘Don’t show your skin, don’t show your thighs. Cover up! Leave something to imagination.

Loosen up. Show some skin. Look sexy. Look hot!

Don’t be provocative. YOU ARE ASKING FOR IT!

You are too dressed up

You are too dressed down.

‘You are asking for it’ statement caught my attention. Its either your red lipstick was too red, or your skirt was too short, or your cleavage was too wide. Or worse… your boobs were too big!

Huddah cosmetics

Stop with the makeup you slut, why are you trying to deceive and trick our men and sons.

Cover up! You are so vain.

Who said you are pretty? Don’t be conceited.

Be humble. Being comfortable in your skin just makes you a hoe.

Be a lady. But at the back of your mind know that whatever you do, the society will judge you, SLUT.

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Do you know the most confounding thing about the word slut? Arguably, it is the most ubiquitous slur used against women. Nobody defines it.  But they can easily point you to a direction of a woman to describe to you what a slut is.

I was brought up to believe that I shouldn’t be called a slut. Otherwise, my promiscuity will be in question. Girl’s purity is an egg to be guarded;

Dress codes

Specific curriculum

Even laws and legislation.

Having too much sex as a woman means you need mental therapy, or you are handling a mental breakdown. A heartbreak maybe. Or you are just being a prosti-tot.

SLUT; a girl, a lady, a woman who deviates from norms of femininity. Do not conform to the society gender script.

The nebulous quality of the slur slut is what makes it seem so distressing. ‘Slut’ hits and sticks to a person in a way that ‘asshole’ never will.

Apparently, the society has decided it. The first rule to being a slut is being a woman.

Men of course are immune to this frenzy definition. When a girl sexts, she is a slut, when a man sexts, he is free from judgment.

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Women are sluts while men are, well, men are men.

They raped me multiple times and took breaks amid doing it. In court, the

thought overflow

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