childhood family feminism life relationship women

Masculine women and Feminine men

When Nollywood actor Pet Edochie fumed at the young men kneeling before a woman, he was backlashed. Pet was comparing happenings in his youthful age against  the youth in this generation. The traditional Igbo man is highly placed in the society. During traditional wedding,the woman kneels down to propose to the man.The one who kneels begs the other for a favor.A typical Igbo man hardly kneels for his fellow man talkless of a woman . He only kneels for the gods who he recognizes as more powerful than he is.

Pet is  not alone. Many men have noticed a decline in the masculinity of men. The Alpha male movement and redpill movement are attempt to correct this imbalance.When did thngs change? When did man begin to loose his ego to stoop so low to kneel before a less powerful being. Was the change sudden or gradual?

Women were seen as irrational and emotional.Men were the rational and strong willed. Men were taught to act like men They had to suppress their emotion close to their heart. Men should never cry in public.  Expression of vulnerability  is a sign of a weak man.  Men are closed minded, rigid and structured. He should not seek fun .Men. Should always be in power, strive for control, compete.They lack empathy necessary for effective communication and connection.

In early days, male children joined their fathers in the river fishing or the forest haunting. Female spent their time with the mothers cooking. Each gender know his role. You hardly see a man in the kitchen or a girl hunting. Men learnt to act like men and women learnt to act like women.Then came the industrial era. Lands meant for farming and hunting was taking over by the government to build factory. The owners of the land were jobless.To offer compensation, the men were integrated as workers in this factory. Their male children were not allowed to follow dad to work.son stays at home with the mum while Dad went to work. Father leaves home as early as eight and comes home by six. He is exhausted, he sleeps to get strength for the next day. Fathers became absent in their son’s life. The role of dad in son life began to reduce while the role of mum in son life began to rise. Mummy passes over her feminine qualities to growing son.

Then came education. Female involvement in  education at an early age especially science and  law improve her reasoning abilities (masculinity) . Female take part in competitive games like the male counterpart. This improves their aggression.These women ended up as heads of organization.They took  decision and gave instructions . These women began to have a thirst of power . Their masculine qualities were awoken.

Girls  who enjoy highly competitive games with a desire to win also increases their aggression (masculinity). We tag such women names like Tomboy. They are ladies with highly developed masculine side and poorly developed feminine side.. Such masculine girls are attracted to  the beta guys. If a man is more masculine in nature,he will be attracted to a very feminine woman who will compliment his energy. Balance men prefer neutral women.. Masculine girls at attracted to a feminine guy or sisi or beta guy . Such guys are few as society teaches guys to wear the Alpha mask. She can only find solace among her fellow feminine women. This is the origin of homosexuality- . Heterosexual are no different from homosexual as both seek balance .

Society has widened this energy balance over the years. Civilisation is bring closing the gap. Homosexual are closer to achieving balance compared to heterosexual. Yet, Homosexuals feel guilty for not complying with society expectation. . There is nothing wrong with homosexuality, for it IS what is. However, we need to bear in mind that society at this time is traumatized due to so many centurie conditioned to comply with that. DO we want to fit in? Until WHEN? We need to learn to Love who we are, while allowing others to be what they want to be. Acceptance is the way of Life.

We should understand that each individual hold masculine and feminine qualities within us. When both qualities are not well alligned, the person is out of balance. The traditional gender roles over the years has created highly masculine males on one hand and highly feminine female on the other side.  we are drawn to certain individual that help us correct these imbalance. These highly masculine males become attracted to highly feminine female.

14 replies on “Masculine women and Feminine men”

Modernization need to meet a certain standard. Communication as well as The internet has brought the world closer even down to the most interior villages, fortunately n unfortunately, certain traditions and culture are struggling to exist not to mention takinf the edge as they exist paripasu with the waveabd influx of do called “modern living” there is almost a universal need to meet up with the latest trends..
The usual basic necessities of life of old in the African context has gone way beyond “food, clothing, shelter, “and also “marriage, children,chieftancy title” to include “latest phone, trending Clothing, fairer skin color, latest car,etc”…Most of these requirements may be subtle on men. But the women folk receive the most backlash if they don’t meet up to these standards and the husbands are forced to work their ass off to provide all these even depriving themselves necessities…Or the women seek other jobs to push up her standard…

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There Is this popular saying that makes man feel responsible and pronounces the entitlement as Head of the Family.. “Mans income is for self, woman and family while woman’s income is for only self”…so why she no go strong pass?
She takes care of children from babyhood through weaning to kidhood..this Is the most stressful part of her Job as she does practically everything got the family from cooking, bathing,
washing, etc… she may even squeeze out time for work.. All stressful.. As the children mature towards adolescent to teenager age..she begins to delegate some chores to the children while doing a little bit.. It becomes less stressful(all things being equal). If she works, it’s an added bonus as she has more time..and the income according to the saying is officially hers exclusively..Officially!
The man Job? Go to work and provide financially for the family from inception…As the children age towards adolescent and teenage age.. They eat more, clothes more, mature clothing =more expensive. Did I forget to mention they are probably in their Senr. Sec. classes and higher institutions? FEES!!! ..He needs to find 3 to 4 streams of income.. Shey na him promise him in-laws to take Care of dem daughter n children in good times n in bad him official work..carry it Cross
The one and only man has to work more to cater for these….
the womans societal accepted role in family gets less stressful while the man’s own is a geometric progression..Again, Why she no go dey stronger?


So African woman has enough time and resource to focus on other areas that are strength – building. While man has many viruses sucking his strength. Another perspective. Thanks


I realize that your culture is different from mine, I have always believed that marriages should be a team. Decisions are shared, work is shared, parenting is shared, and both man and woman work for the benefit of the family. I have worked hard all of my life and never felt that my money was my own alone. i most certainly would never accept any relationship that was not a relationship of equals. I assure you that I am totally female and feminine and have always respected and appreciated men, just as I expect respect from others. Cheryl

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For me the question is, why do humans think there need to be some higher and above others-and if you can strife for it, it needs to be you-so why?
In Islam is the story of Iblis an angelic being. After God made men he asks the angles to kneel in reverence before Adam, God’s creation. Iblis refuses to bow before another creation, only wanting to bow before God, the creator of all things. In refusing to bow before the will of God he refuses to bow before God himself, putting his will and therefore himself above God. And this is how we read it in the Bible. Iblis or here Satan wanting to be God himself and that means have others under him, deceives Adam and Eve to disobey God and eat of the fruit of knowledge of good and evil. Mind here they lived in Paradise where there was no evil not even the tiniest bad thing so how could they know what is good if there is no comparison?
Men are curios and want to know, so they ate what means there conscience awoke for the first time making them feel awful bad. Their mind was now polluted, and they could not stay any longer in the presence of God and where driven from God-to where? The world that was now ruled by Satan.
When God, who is love and loves his creation and would want to bring them back in His presence sent the solution, his son Jesus, the way for men back to God, Satan tried hard to even deceive Jesus to bow before him, as Adam and Eve have done and men is doing ever since, by bowing to Satan’s will. Read it in Luke 4 of the Bible!
So, your question: “When did man begin to loose his ego to stoop so low to kneel before a less powerful being. Was the change sudden or gradual?” I would answer it started there in the garden when that thought was put in their mind that there should be some above and some under you. The deceiving promise of Satan was:” you will be like God” (Genesis 3) – that means have nobody above you. Is this the reason less and less people do want to even want to believe that there is a God at all, making themselves Gods who can solve all problems on their own.
Yes, God himself made the rule what place there should be for everyone for with God there is order, not strife and chaos. But as we live in Satan’s world who is the opposite of God, we have disorder and chaos, greed and strife; Strife to be above the others to rule over others. In former times this was mainly manifested in wars, today clever men found new ways to rule and be master over others-money! Money means power and might today.
And the way out? Still the same as it was paved 2.000 years ago Jesus, the way the truth and the live!
This goes against your grain?
You refuse to bow before a man out of flesh and blood, like Iblis refused?
Yes, Jesus came in flesh and blood and had to live under the same condition as we do, but that makes him an advocate who understands us perfectly and therefore can defend us before God the judge. And that is by far not all. He took the punishment for all we have done wrong on himself, paid the price for our since so we can go free-free into Heaven. And what is heaven like? Where there is no strife, no esteeming one better or above the other-isn’t that the ideal? But to get to that ideal we need our dirty hearts and minds be washed from strife, greed, and selfishness, and all that pollutes the earth, washed in the blood of Christ, the only solution!
P.S. And what does the Bible say about the Angels?
Are they not all ministering spirits sent out to serve (bow in this way to men) for the sake of those who are to inherit salvation? – Hebrews 1:14
And if you agree, share it with your raders.


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